


Your name is also Derek?

by lsdme



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-11
Updated: 2013-11-11
Packaged: 2018-01-01 03:44:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1039955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lsdme/pseuds/lsdme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Derek learns what Stiles' actual name is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your name is also Derek?

**Author's Note:**

> Pure crack fic because last week accol said, "what if stiles' real name was also Derek?"

It started off subtle, almost not even worthy of mention.

Stiles would be working on something, Derek would be reading nearby, and he would hear Stiles huff and mumble “goddammit Derek,” or something similar.

The first time it happened Derek had asked “What?”

Stiles looked up at him confused.

“What?” Derek repeated.

“Oh nothing,” Stiles would shake his head and look back down at his work. “I just can’t figure this out.”

“How is that my fault?” Derek asked, knowing for a fact that he had been sitting perfectly still and completely silent.

Stiles looked even more confused. “I never said it was?” he said, confusion evident in his voice. 

Derek’s brow furrowed, Stiles’ brow furrowed. There was a lot of furrowing of brows before Stiles dropped his papers on the floor giving up. “Screw it. Let’s make-out instead.”

Derek really couldn’t argue with that.

___________________________________

“So what you’re saying is that if we want to get down to business we’ve got to defeat the Huns?” Stiles asked, his mouth actively trying not to curl up in the corners. 

Derek rolled his eyes wishing for a simpler time, a time before he understood that reference. 

“That’s not what I’m saying at all Stiles and you know it,” Derek said as he slid the map of the preserve back in front of Stiles. “What I’m saying is….” 

“Yo Derek!” Scott interrupted, running into the loft. 

Derek and Stiles turned as one. “Hey,” they said in unison before looking at each other. Stiles cringed and ducked his head, suddenly extremely interested in the map before him. 

__________________________________

“What’s your name?” Derek whispered one night, his mouth pressed to the back of Stiles’ neck.

“I’m pretty sure I heard you yelling it about ten minutes ago, dude,” Stiles joked, his own voice a little hoarse. 

“No, your real name,” he said, scooting closer as Stiles grabbed at his forearm that rested along his side and pulled it across his stomach to hold Derek’s hand. 

Stiles shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.” 

“Of course it matters,” Derek told him. “It’s your name.”

“Derek,” Stiles said, rolling over to face him in the darkness of the room. “You can’t be the only mysterious one in this relationship. You get to have the power that comes from soul-crushing eyebrows that make all brows feel inadequate and I get to be an enigma of biblical proportions - _the man with no name_.”

Derek could hear the italics. “Biblical?” Derek asked, smiling softly. 

“Yes now let me sleep,” Stiles mumbled as he ducked his head, his lips quietly resting on Derek’s shoulder. 

“‘Night,” Derek whispered, happy there in the dark. 

___________________________________

“Derek get your ass in this living room right now!” the Sheriff yelled, his voice carrying through the house. 

Derek froze on the spot, one hand getting a coffee cup out of the cupboard and the other (now) crushing a tea bag. His mind spun as he tried to figure out what he had done to elicit such a reaction out of the Sheriff, but nothing was coming to mind. It had even been over a year since he last walked in on Stiles and Derek having sex. Stiles was getting ready to move permanently into the loft to avoid such things again. (Yes that was the main reason why, not their “intense werewolf-human love” as Stiles liked to call it. Definitely not the love, the warmth in his heart he felt every time he looked at Stiles…)

With a speed he didn’t think was possible, Stiles came tearing by him and slid into the living room where his dad was standing. 

“Heyyyy dad, what’s up? Nothing is going on here. Derek is in the kitchen, are you trying to scare him off still?” Stiles’ voice was tight and then he forced a laugh in a weird attempt to sound casual. 

He heard Stiles’ dad exhale hard. “I didn’t…,” he started before pausing. “Don’t you think you ‘ought to tell….” 

“Nope! Stop!” Stiles yelled. “Sorry, got to run. Crazy day dad, moving the last of the boxes. Oh would you look at the time, we’ve got to dash.” 

“Got to dash?” Derek asked, moving to lean against the door frame in between the kitchen and living room. 

Stiles turned to him and immediately grabbed his arm in an effort to usher them out of the house. 

“Was there something wrong?” Derek asked the Sheriff as he stood there, refusing to budge from his spot even with Stiles doing that weird thing with his eyebrows that meant I’d-like-to-be-anywhere-but-here-please-and-thank-you-now-can-we-get-the-fuck-out-of-here. 

“I guess not, son,” the Sheriff said, sitting down on the couch. “I’ll see you later, Derek.” 

“Okay,” Derek and Stiles said at the same time again. 

Derek scrunched up his face and looked at Stiles. “What’s going on with you?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

________________________________

One afternoon, on a day like any other, Derek walked into the loft, tossed his keys onto the side table, and walked into the kitchen. 

While he was filling a glass with ice he noticed a file folder sitting on the countertop. He stared at it curiously while water filled the cup, the ice cracking and popping in a way that was practically yelling at him to flip it open to see what was inside. 

Lacking any self-control whatsoever Derek set his glass down and moved to open the folder. He froze as his eyes skimmed the content. Was he…No he couldn’t be reading this right. There was no way this could have been kept a secret for as long as it was. Or maybe it wasn’t a secret and Derek was the only one not in on the joke. Was this all one big joke?

He was staring down at it when Stiles and Scott strode in the door talking loudly about whatever movie they were getting back from seeing. 

“Oh shit,” Stiles whispered, but Derek heard him clear as day across the room. 

“What are you looking at, Derek?” Scott asked as he walked over and started drinking Derek’s discarded glass of water. 

“Uhh, I can explain,” Stiles said. 

“Your name,” Derek paused. “Your name is also Derek?” 

Scott choked, his mouthful of water spilling out the sides of his mouth. 

“Weird, huh?” Stiles said, scratching the back of his neck. 

“Derek Stilinski,” Derek (the original) said, his voice flat. 

Stiles (Derek #2) shrugged. “Surprise.” 

Silence fell between them as Scott coughed either on the water or an attempt to keep himself from laughing. “I’m just gonna….” he managed to say, pointing to the door.

Derek sighed, maybe also wishing for a time before Stiles’ birth certificate was just sitting on the counter begging to be found, a time before he discovered that he and his boyfriend had the same name. 

“Wait,” Scott said, one hand on the door as he started to pull it shut. “Does this mean that Stiles has been screaming his own name in bed for the past two years?”


End file.
